Day 3 f’n Sucks!!!

So, what’s been happening?

Well, last week I managed two whole days alcohol-free, consciously planning that I would do two because it was a step up from the single day the previous week and fitted around “life”. I was genuinely pretty happy with how it went in the sense that whilst it was hard, it wasn’t that hard. Getting out for a walk after work really really helps kill the immediate brain panic of “need to unwind, must drink”.

The trouble is, this is the week after. A week where I set the target of three days alcohol-free, and here we are on day three.

It’s the afternoon, the morning wasn’t too bad, but for whatever reason the Toddler has woken up and is shouting, I want a drink, I want to relax, I just crave “the thing” having a drink will give me, if only for a second. I guess that’s the addiction talking, but I want the thing.

The past two days were fine, manageable, no return to that panicked state the first time I attempted an evening without booze. Yet here we are back to that feeling, the crawling scratching mind that wants to escape my body

ARGH!!!!!!!

This sucks.

I can feel excuses being offered to myself by the Toddler, about doing it next week, having a drink tonight, it’s very hard to ignore. It doesn’t help IU’m on a diet, I’m trying to get back to some sort of pre-lockdown shape, something the booze has not helped with.

Ye I want it, I crave it

shite!